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Issue 14 |
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Entire Graduating Class To Attend Madison |
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I Think I'll Wear My Sandals Today |
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Super Happy Fun Quiz II |
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Local Student Beaten Senseless |
| Taxes Suck |
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Pope Condemns Easter |
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Back To The Archives |
 
Entire Graduating Class To Attend University Of Wisconsin-Madison |
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Higher education reached a new low Monday, as school officials announced that the entire Class of 1998 at Wauwatosa East High School had officially committed to attending the University of Wisconsin-Madison.
I Think I'll Wear My Sandals Today Local Student Beaten Senseless This issue sponsored by the most wonderful girl on the face of the planet. And probably most other planets as well, although I've never been to any, so I couldn't tell you for sure. I'd be willing to bet she's tops in the solar system though.
The Underground would like to thank Strange Attractor Records' superstar Mako (even though I hear he's changing his name now) for playing at The Underground's six month anniversary party back on Thursday the 2nd. In case you weren't there, and if you weren't invited or didn't come, then you probably weren't, Mako played some old favorites, premiered some new material (some of it might even find its way onto an upcoming release) and generally kicked ass. Newman's Notes: Featuring the two best articles ever published in The Underground -- "Entire Graduating Class To Attend University Of Wisconsin-Madison" and "I Think I'll Wear My Sandals Today" -- I think that Issue 14 is the best Underground ever. Entire Graduating Class was one of four articles written by me while in Switzerland over spring break (along with "Pope Condemns Easter," Issue 17's headline article and another unpublished article), while Sandals was written before Easter in the newsroom by The Regulator, and almost caused Jeff Pertl to lose his lunch as he read it over his shoulder. As if those two articles weren't enough, "Local Student Beaten Senseless" is considered the best article by Kesus because of the ruthless satire of the controversy over Dan Moore's cartoon criticizing the Wauwatosa police in the Cardinal News, "Super Happy Fun Quiz II," created during an Advanced Biology lecture, has something for everyone, and "Taxes Suck" is both a conspiracy corner and more making fun of The Regulator's mom. * Only on The Underground Online
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